Mullah Dadullah Rocks!

He’s got the latest, flashiest pajamas.  Double barrelled disco tiger-stripe RPG.  MTV pimped his technical.  No way Rule No. 19 applies to Mullah Dadullah … you know he’s gotta have mobs of beardless boys swooning over him … he’s like a Taliban rock star

If Osama bin Laden likes being in the global spotlight, he’s likely a bit depressed in his hideout these days. The leader of the al-Qaida terrorist organization hasn’t made an appearance on the evening news for quite some time. What’s more, the Taliban no longer need bin Laden as a figurehead. Western intelligence agencies warn that the Taliban now have “their own star” in their struggle against Western soldiers and the Afghan government of President Hamid Karzai. The new nightmare from the Hindu Kush Mountains is called Mullah Dadullah. He sports a pitch black beard, always wears a military jacket and these days, he is omnipresent in the media.

OK, so maybe I hyped him up a little.  But you know no Rule No. 19 doesn’t apply to no Mullah Dadullah!

Bloodthirsty propaganda is everywhere in northern Pakistan near the border with Afghanistan. Virtually every CD salesman in Peshawar is selling the latest films released by the Taliban leader. “Oh, you want the Dadullah tapes,” says one. “They’re very popular right now.” He disappears for barely a minute and then returns with an entire stack. He charges about €3 ($4) per film. Those who buy several get a discount. But he doesn’t want his picture taken. He says Pakistani police already causes him enough trouble when they find terror DVDs in the suitcases of journalists at the airport.

Mullah Dadullah is totally sick, dude! Asstastic. Sexellent. That one-eyed Mullah Omar is so 2001. 

Dadullah’s films serve to provide the Taliban with present-day legends. They’re professionally produced in al-Sahab, the Taliban’s media center in Qetta, southern Pakistan. Hundreds of Taliban fighters are seen performing military exercises with machine guns. Then they fire grenade-launchers — of which they seem to have plenty. Every shot is accompanied by a chorus of voices emphatically shouting: “God is great!” Next, the films show footage of wrecked US military vehicles. “We will hit them again,” a voice-over announces triumphantly.

Al-Sahab, the Taliban’s media center in Quetta! That place rocks, too! We should have a rock concert there!  Really rock the place! 

Almost all the DVDs feature footage of the brutal execution of alleged CIA spies. The “helpers of the infidels” have their heads removed while still alive. About 250 such murders have occurred in recent months.

 

Mostly, however, the films show the new hero — the new face of resistance. Mullah Dudallah, a stocky man, about 40 years old, is worshipped like a saint. Although he lost a leg in battle during the 1990s, he is seen vigorously pacing up a mountain with his fighters. Once at the top, he can’t resist firing a rocket into the distance himself. Then he kneels down to pray with his men, his AK-47 next to him the whole time. The sun sets blood-red behind the mountains. It’s hard to imagine a more effective propaganda film.

Helping in infidels is wicked lame.  Vigorous stocky saint-worshipped one-legged mountain-pacing rocket-firing prayers … shut up!

Update: Dadullah dropping names in his interview with the Beeb. “Me and Osama, we’re like that.”

h/t Captains Quarters, where the captain cuts through the hype.

 

Topics: Afghanistan

  Posted by Jules Crittenden at 8:12 am on Thursday, March 1, 2007

5 Responses to “Mullah Dadullah Rocks!”

  1. RebeccaH Says:

    Everybody keeps talking about an impending military action against Iran. Maybe we should be taking on Pakistan. Let Iran make of that what they will.

  2. saltydog Says:

    It’s past time to start bombing the hell out of those autonomous Pak regions. If the women and children don’t like it, let the men kick out the cause.

  3. Bill's Bites Says:

    Move Over, Omar

    Move Over, Omar The Taliban have a new commander and a new public face for their terrorism. Mullah Dadullah has become the new rock star of the jihad in Waziristan, and his emergence could portend an especially tough spring for Afghanistan and its NATO…

  4. alphabet city Says:

    Dadullah: ‘Muslims now possess nuclear deterrent’

    Mullah Dadullah rocks, oh yeah. But so does professor John Shroder. Literally. Rocks are his life.

  5. ast Says:

    I saw that, too. What is this, Glam Jihad? Suicide Chic? It must be like pre-Nazi Berlin over there. Cabaret Redux.

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