Morons Triumphant!
But of course it was the Americans’ fault! Damned Americans seizing Iranian agents inside Iraq forced the mullahs to seize some Brit swabs! Even a moron can see that when Revolutionary Guards are minding their own business, financing murder and creating chaos in someone else’s country, the last thing you need is a bunch of stupid Americans to come along …
Diplomatic efforts hampered by attacks on embassy. Poppycock and balderdash! Stoning embassies and the seizure of jolly Jack tars are diplomacy, mullah-style. Any moron should know that! Which is why we need to start diplomatically blockading their ports and leveling their military infrastructure.
No fair for morons to stroll with security! NYT goes for a stroll in McCain’s bazaar … emerges strangely unscathed and loaded up with great bargains! The discerning shopper, no moron, demands to see some of the old pre-surge stock:
Shorja, the city’s oldest and largest market, set in a sprawling labyrinth of narrow streets and alleyways, has been bombed at least a half-dozen times since last summer.
The dsicerning shopper casts a critical eye on the workmanship:
… But those measures, while making the markets safer, have not made them safe.
Because safer will never be safe enough! But let’s go straight to these bargain basement condemnations:
Ali Jassim Faiyad, whose electrical appliances shop was open the day after the notorious stroll despite the horrific conditions: “The security procedures were abnormal!”
Aboud Sharif Kadhoury, who was peddling rugs at a sidewalk stand despite the horrific lack of security: “They asked about our conditions, and we told them the situation was bad.”
McCain, stupidly unaware that moments before he arrived and immediately upon his departure, the market was under relentless assault, brashly states: “Things are better and there are encouraging signs.”
Reuters, oddly finds merchants who agree. What is the matter with these people? Are they morons?
CNN’s non-heckling snark Michael Ware was the picture of demure politeness! Just like he is when he hangs out with terrorists! If you are a moron like me, you may want to learn from Michael, how one carries terrorist water to loftier ends.
The New Partisanship! It transcends the water’s edge. What kind of moron would think this will encourage our enemies? Speaking of morons, this one hasn’t lost that Loven feelin’ … woah that Loven feelin’ …
What kind of moron would keep trotting out the same old news? The kind of moron that thinks you’re a moron! Associated morons!
Moron warmongers forced to admit surge will take time! Sagely, peaceniks neglect to acknowledge the warmongers have been saying that all along. Peaceniks, still lacking any plan that doesn’t end in massive bloodshed and regional chaos, also wisely remain reluctant to acknowledge surge results or heed one of their own darlings when he tells them, it could work.
Now when you have great moron news like deaths are up, why would you want to ruin it with something moronic like the news that deaths are actually down? Don’t be a moron, you moron! (h/t Blackfive, moron extraordinaire!)
Talk about morons. Here’s me and some of my pals 4 years ago today. Being morons.
We who are about to be morons salute you!
Morons saluting morons behaving moronically!
Polls results indicate Americans don’t want to Dems to make us lose in Iraq. What morons! Don’t they know losing is winning?
Morons fixated on the rearview mirror espy some exciting cloak-and-dagger activity but fails to observe the great anti-Bush principle, that false does not always mean not true. An inconvenient truth, so to speak.
Champion of Morons inspires moronocy!
Morons all, we look to the Moron Laureate for inspiration as we close. (h/t Ace, literary moron)
Topics: moronocy
Posted by Jules Crittenden at 10:45 am on Tuesday, April 3, 2007
9 Responses to “Morons Triumphant!”
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April 3rd, 2007 at 12:38 pm
Jules, did you mean to say:
“Damned Americans seizing _Iraqi_ agents inside Iraq” in your first paragraph?
April 3rd, 2007 at 1:29 pm
2007.04.03 Iran/Brit Hostage Crisis Roundup — Time Out On US Causing Hostage Crisis
Left-wing British paper recycles three-month-old story to blame U.S. for hostage crisisAllahpundit Good stuff. Pretend to break news that’s already been reported, assert a causal connection to another event without a single source to support it, then…
April 3rd, 2007 at 1:32 pm
Comrades,
Actually, it’s still probably safer to stroll down any street in Iraq than some sections of DC, Boston, LA, or Chicago. Especially more safer than many sections of Detroit or New Orleans.
Of course, the MSM seems to get all in a lather whenever a homicide bomber kills some folks. “UNSAFE!” they cry. “TOO DANGEROUS!” they will lament. And yet, somehow, they gloss over the more than 25,000 we kill on our own roads every year just in alcohol-related accidents. Perhaps the MSM simply considers them “collateral damage” to the development of highway freedom in America.
Or perhaps, the MSM could care less because those accident victims are just Americans, and reporting those deaths doesn’t help to undermine the current Administration. Hmmmmm….. Maybe we’re on to something there.
Respects,
April 3rd, 2007 at 1:35 pm
2007.04.03 Iraq/Surrendercrat Roundup — Never trust a Democrat — The Newsman More Terrorists Trust– Harry “Land Shark” Reid Empowers Our Enemies
The speech Bush should give Murdoc If Murdoc had his way, once the emergency spending bill was sent on to the White House, President Bush would give a speech explaining why he was going to veto it. And it would
April 3rd, 2007 at 3:10 pm
Drudge has a photo of Nancy Pelosi with a headscarf on, presumably while she is in the Land of the Kindly Islamists! Talk about beclowning herself and everyone in America.
I might add that even The Dweeb Prince’s Camille went to see the Saudis in slacks.
April 3rd, 2007 at 5:42 pm
Uh, yeah S-Dog … I meant that … before I didn’t
April 3rd, 2007 at 6:26 pm
If, when Bush & Blair are done with their Jimmy Carter imitations, we end up swapping the Iranians we snatched in peaceful Kurdistan for the Bristish sailors, we’ll know there was indeed a connection.
April 3rd, 2007 at 7:55 pm
we’ll know there was indeed a connection
That “connection” being commonly known as “a deal”.
April 4th, 2007 at 4:09 am
There’s a certain comfort in knowing our very own moron will show up on cue.