In your case, I don’t know if this will help a little, but I pray that you had spent a good amount of time with him, teaching him how to live, love and deal with life head on. One thing I will suggest is don’t shut out the memories you had together in going through the grief process. It only bottles them up where they lurk, seeking freedom from the repression. Another thing to consider is ‘the why’ he was in Iraq. I recall in the earlier part of this script that “he joined the Army to serve his country.” What might help you with this horrendous loss is what my son, also an Army Lt. in Iraq who heads a unit doing “route clearance” (clearing roads of IEDs and EFPs) said to me before his deployment. My Michael is from a very long line of patriots who have served our country for generations and prior to his deployment, he emphatically made it clear to me that it was his choice to serve in the Army and go wherever he could to make the world a better place and keep America safe. He stressed emphatically that if he is killed not to blame or hold the Army or our government responsible. He just wanted to pay his “dues” for the freedom our country enjoys.

My point here is that I strongly suspect that your Lt. Andy had the same idea although it wasn’t mentioned in the media very clearly. In the event you and your son didn’t have the same conversation my son and I did, please borrow from us and believe he didn’t die in vain; rather, he died doing what he wanted to do and thought he should be doing. I fully believe it will be very hard on me if my son is killed over there in spite that he firmly stressed that it was his choice and gave cogent points to support his choice.

In closing, I strongly believe Andy has been embraced by Gods Divine Light and drawn to the place many call heaven, where his soul will unite with others who have made the ultimate sacrifice as a donation in serving humanity. May God bless him and bring peace to those he left behind.

Charlie in San Diego, CA

I rarely do fallen hero pieces because this is mostly a political blog and I do not think anybody should have their death politicized.

May you be given the strength, to remember all of your sons life. He’ll be looking down on you and your family to move forward. May he rest in peace.

A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention.

I walk my only son to war,
Knowing the door of death is open.
I kiss him hard upon his lips,
Their warmth clings only a moment.

The life he offers, mine before,
Is on the path he’s chosen.
He walks with patriotic pride,
With heroes brave and gallant.

Who rages against his noble cause,
Find his will and soul are golden.
And though he fall to brutal hands,
With pride my heart is swollen.

The death of him, is it my own,
Will this the enemy embolden?
How shall I count the futures lost,
Days joyless with no atonement?

A death is owed by each of us,
The blessed death is given,
For others we have dearly loved,
That they may live in freedom.

God grant him heavenly rest and his family the peace that passes understanding.

First Lieutenant Andrew J. Bacevich, Jr. has been killed in action.
The son of a Boston University professor who has been a critic of the war was killed in Iraq, the Defense Department said Monday. First Lt. Andrew J. Bacevich was the son of Andrew J. …