Sheehan vs. Pelosi
Blabbermouth’s up to her third announcement. For God’s sake, start running already!
She may have figured out its going to be harder to get national press on this than she thought, and absent a debate, which isn’t likely to happen, she’ll have to start dreaming up stunts. Set up a squatter’s camp in the Panhandle. Alamo Square, maybe, it has a better backdrop with those four Victorians. Swim from Alcatraz. Occupy Alcatraz. It worked for those Indians. Use a laser to flash “Pelosi Lied” messages and anti-war heiroglyphs on the side of the TransAmerica Pyramid. Skateboard down Lombard Street. Chain herself to the cable car tracks. Liberate the bison in Golden Gate Park and herd them down Market Street. Bungee jump off the Golden Gate Bridge. Heck, maybe a mass jump for peace off the Golden Gate Bridge. People do that and live, you know. Sometimes. Gotta have faith. Anyway, that would get some press. Just trying to be helpful. She’s going to need to court the city’s important gay vote. Howzabout, run out in the middle of Castro Street and holler, “Pelosi-loving GLBT are warmongering scum!” That would get press, too.
Meanwhile, the announcements will have to do:
Citing her son as inspiration, a tearful Cindy Sheehan announced her candidacy Thursday for the U.S. House of Representatives …
“The country is ripe for a change,” said Sheehan, who spoke at a podium with her son’s photograph attached to it. “It’s going to start right here and right now.”
Opposition strategy noted. They’ll pretend like she doesn’t exist:
Nadeam Elshami, a spokesman for Pelosi, said the speaker has always opposed the war in Iraq and has focused on bringing troops home “safely and soon.”
He would not comment on Sheehan’s candidacy.
There are a couple of problems. Several million, actually.
Sheehan admitted she has no funds for a campaign, but planned to immediately get started raising money. Without giving further specifics, Sheehan said she wouldn’t accept money from corporations and would run on a platform of universal health care. Sheehan said she also wants to make college affordable and improve ethics in the legislative and executive branches …
Daniel Ellsberg, the former high-level Pentagon analyst who in 1969 leaked the Pentagon Papers to Congress and the media, showed his support for Sheehan. Ellsberg was arrested twice with other protesters outside Bush’s Texas ranch.
“At the moment, facing a well-funded, powerful incumbent without party support, the odds against Cindy appear insuperable,” Ellsberg said. “But we plan to change that.”
It’s the San Francisco treat! I strongly endorse this race. I could actually break my cardinal rule and give money to a pol for this one, just to keep it going. Don’t particularly care who’s left standing in the end, it’s all about the spectacle. As a professional tabloid journalist, of course, I’m obliged to hold out for a Sheehan win, that being the one that would sell more newspapers. A Pelosi battered and reeling from 17 months in the ring with an unhinged but quite determined ditch-dweller would be an acceptable second. Have to say, though, while Sheehan has picked a race in a district where she could conceivably pull it off, I’m disappointed she didn’t go where she could do the most damage, I mean bring the most attention to her cause … plenty of do-nothing hypocrites in the Democratic 2008 field, too, Cindy!
Influence Peddler’s got your Cindy vid and more.
Topics: pols
Posted by Jules Crittenden at 2:06 pm Comments (5) on Friday, August 10, 2007
5 Responses to “Sheehan vs. Pelosi”
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August 10th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
Wow, who knew? Not only can you write, but you’re also a PR genius!
Your tactical suggestions for the campaign are terrific. I’ll help fund the swim from Alcatraz. And the bison, too. Yeah, we gotta have the bison. Herding them down Market Street should be no problem for a professional ditch-dweller, eh?
FREE THE GOLDEN GATE ELEVEN!
August 10th, 2007 at 4:10 pm
Well, Jules, you get the nod for the day’s best knee-slapping belly-laugh. I will work to raise the money for the bungee-jump, hell, I’ll even volunteer to rig it for them, but only if Ellsberg and St. Ma hold hands and jump together.
The national Ma has exploited her son in truly disgusting ways since his death, but I must give her proper due–using his picture to help her announce her candidacy just tops them all.
August 10th, 2007 at 7:03 pm
I’d call it a political cat fight, but it’s Cindy and Nancy. So cow fight it is.
August 10th, 2007 at 10:24 pm
Cindy Sheehan…our own generation’s Squeaky Fromme.
Some more “stunts” Cindy and her Code Pink buddies could pull off:
- Leather and Lace Day in front of the Board of Supervisors Building, in cooperation with the Tenderloin district.
- Nude transit riding on all MUNI services, including the F-Market historical trolley. (Ultra-dark sunglasses for the kiddies and people with no appreciation for “real” nudity!)
- Feed Pelosi effigies to the sharks off Fisherman’s Wharf – complete with realistic blood and guts! (Cheney and Bush effigies sold out a long time ago.)
- Anti-W slogan message magnets – nothing says “determined and principled” like BUSH MONKEY IS LACKEY CAPITALIST MACHINE WARMONGER!
- The California Lottery’s CINDY SHEEHAN’S CASH IMPEACHMENT SPECTACULAR – win a free trip with the Code Pink crew to Washington, all hotels, restaurants and bail money included! Loaded with $20 prizes!
(No, I’m not trying to get into the New York Daily News “Best of the Weblogs” entry, often occupied by Jules’ words o’ wisdom.)
August 10th, 2007 at 11:23 pm
One word: Puppets. Big ones.