Deceivers!!!
By the Beard of the Prophet, I will smite you all for your insolence!
This lying son of a camel is obviously in the pay of your criminal imposter president, may he choke on a pretzel!
Even now the words of your great Prophet HariReid are coming to pass - your so-called “Surge” has failed. Your U.S. Marines are committing suicide by the millions in the streets of Habbaniyah! Our brave Iraqi children rise up in fury and drive your cowardly Army from their land with sharp sticks!
Infidels! You offend the Nostrils of the Imponderable with your ceaseless prattling of “regrouping, negotiation, and time”. I curse you all! May your Stomachs roast in Hell for all Eternity!
Update: Finally! Obviously a paragon of unparalleled wisdom!
Topics: GWOT
Posted by Moqtada al-Sadr at 8:47 am on Thursday, August 30, 2007
27 Responses to “Deceivers!!!”
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August 30th, 2007 at 10:29 am
Yeah, well… your mother wears army boots! And a burka!
August 30th, 2007 at 10:56 am
Shameless One!
Why has your husband allowed you to walk out in the sunlight, instead of cooking and cleaning for him and your twelve sons, as is proper? Truly it has been written: an insolent woman and a camel should be beaten thrice daily!
August 30th, 2007 at 11:01 am
And why has he allowed you to learn to read? This is an abomination!!!!
These American men, they cannot control their wayward females! When the Jihad comes to your country, there will be a Great Reckoning!
August 30th, 2007 at 11:07 am
Yo, Mookie! Yer mama!
August 30th, 2007 at 12:14 pm
These American men, they cannot control their wayward females! When the Jihad comes to your country, there will be a Great Reckoning!
YEAH BABY! This is like Christmas…I wanna red head, a blond, a brunette, all with BIG mammaries, please.
August 30th, 2007 at 12:14 pm
Silence, Blasphemer!!!
How do we know you are the *real* JeffS and not some substandard foreign import, probably laced with pesticides and not even inspected by your worthless USDA?
BAH!!! You are all servile, mincing lackeys of the rent seeking, Chinese-toy-loving, Bill-O’Reilly-watching richest 1%! Go back to your COSTCO and your Barcoloungers! I denounce you all!
August 30th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
The gaunlet has been tossed TRJ….show Moqtada your “REAL” JeffS.
One never knows what is under those robes…you may be tickled…or…well never mind.
August 30th, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Son of a deranged she-goat!
Moqtada only allows Osama to tickle…. err…nevermind.
August 30th, 2007 at 1:51 pm
My oh my, how our cousins do go on about one another
August 30th, 2007 at 2:20 pm
You show up here and I’ll show you a great reckoning. This American female could whoop it up on you before you knew what hit you. You’d better make sure you never, ever go to sleep, or you’ll wake up bald, beardless and with your toe nails painted a nice hot pink..
August 30th, 2007 at 2:45 pm
Mookie and Osama, sittin’ in a tree!
K - I - S - S - I - N - G!
First comes love!
Then comes marriage!
Then comes a Hellfire from a Reaper!
KA-BOOOOOOOOM!
(Yes, I know, it doesn’t rhyme, but I like the ending.)
August 30th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
Unbelievers! I curse you all!
May the Fleas of a Thousand Camels visit you in an Uncomfortable Place!
May an amorous dachshund call your forearm, “Schatzi”.
August 30th, 2007 at 4:21 pm
You’d better make sure you never, ever go to sleep, or you’ll wake up bald, beardless and with your toe nails painted a nice hot pink..
Hmmm….. would that be a bluish pink, or more of a coral, Infidel? The blue would be better with Moqtada’s skintones….
August 30th, 2007 at 4:23 pm
Muktard the Satyr:
How’s that heroin addiction going for you? Wasn’t it nice of your friends in the Iranian gov to supply your every want and desire?
PS. don’t go near any windows in your hideout house. The missiles have been launched and will be there soon.
PSYCH! They wont be launched until later on tonight. Or maybe tomorrow. Or sometime next week.
But soon, and for the rest of your life, KABOOM!
Until then, relax, enjoy and sleep well.
August 30th, 2007 at 5:05 pm
No fear Moqtada…soon we’ll hit the road…Achmed, Farouk, Ali and Moqtada Show.
I can see it now, The Lighter Side of Terror, starring Moqtada and the Three Bozo’s. I’ll be passing the hats you blow off the audience. What fun.
August 30th, 2007 at 8:31 pm
Hey Moq! How about I have my twelve sons come over there and have a discussion with you about that “beating thrice daily” thing?
August 30th, 2007 at 11:01 pm
“After the U.K. and U.S. are gone, the argument is, Sadr will be ready and waiting to stake his claim to power — violently. ”
Sounds about right.
From Mokie’s own link.
August 30th, 2007 at 11:24 pm
“…an insolent woman and a camel should be beaten thrice daily!”
Mokie sure makes a lot of references to camels.
So did Ayatollah Khomieni , fatwa, to wit..
“If one commits the act of sodomy with a cow, a ewe, or a camel, their urine and their excrement become impure, and even their milk may no longer be consumed. The animal must then be killed and as quickly as possible and burned.”
Source: Khomeini, Ruhollah (1985). Sayings of the Ayatollah Khomeini: Political, Philosophical, Social, & Religious, 47, United States: Bantam Books)
.
August 31st, 2007 at 12:03 am
tanstaafl:
That does beg the question, doesn’t it?
When, exactly, is the urine and excrement of a cow, ewe or a camel pure and permittable for consumption?
August 31st, 2007 at 2:01 am
Oooooohhhhhhh, I see now. I thought the fatwa was talking about the impure and corrupted urine, excrement and milk of the sodomite, not the poor animals. Silly me. I was sitting here contemplating the anatomical and biological differences there must be between sodomite beasty boys and, well. . . everybody else. I figured that maybe that Islamic science (ah choo) I’ve heard about had come up with their version of Frankenstien’s monster, and the rabble was doing their best to rid themselves of this hell on earth. Decapitation work for monsters, too, right? Somebody ought to tell them that.
At least, that’s what I was thinking before I learned from Grimmy that the fatwa was talking about the animals. Regardless-not-withstanding, maybe we ought to think about decapitating monsters. Tit for tat (’scuse me Cid). Take away that particular speciality they hold dear for infidels. Put out our own DVDs of the beheadings. Something for the kiddies to consider. Just something I’ve wondered about . . . in the wee small hours . . . over a brandy.
A little side note: We are leaving the dock tomorrow and sailing west for a few days. No phone. No intrawebby. No news. Be back Tuesday. If the world is still here.
August 31st, 2007 at 6:53 am
Fools! Your days are numbered! Soon I shall call down the awesome wrath of the Great HariReid upon you!
Together with the John that is Kerry, who was unmistakably on the record as being Forgainst this illegal and immoral war for Oil, he shall Shake the Stern Finger of International Consensus at you!
O! Many shall be the tut-tutting, chastisings, and rebukings of France and Germany called down upon your Unworthy Heads on that day, I tell you!
TREMBLE!!!!
August 31st, 2007 at 7:09 am
Don’t say I didn’t tell you TRJ. Under those robes, that sweaty fat face and fake beard, there is something completely different.
Moqtada, married one of these
August 31st, 2007 at 9:03 am
“When, exactly, is the urine and excrement of a cow, ewe or a camel pure…”
I had the same thought.
What was the status of these, uh, effluences before the act ?
Anyway, it’s an outrage to take it out on the poor animal.
I guess the guy doing the sodomy just has to wash up.
August 31st, 2007 at 9:07 am
‘We are leaving the dock tomorrow and sailing west for a few days.”
Bon voyage !
August 31st, 2007 at 9:43 am
Salty…Bon voyage, indeed. Remember to stow the mortars, RPG’s and other weapons for all those skull and crossbones types….:)
August 31st, 2007 at 10:57 am
“A Most Civil War”
.
(a day in the life of a Baghdad family - Bashir, a young man, enters his family’s apartment)
Bashir: Greetings Father, Praise be to Allah.
Father: Praise be to Allah.
Bashir: It’s hot in here. Did we have any electricity today?
Father: One hour, tops. May Allah rain perversions on the Imperialist American Pigs!Bashir: That sucks. A thousand perversions to the Infidels.
Father: What did you do today?
Bashir: Praise be to Allah, I put out one roadside IED and helped prepare a suicider for a Mosque mission at evening prayers.
Father: Praise be to Allah, but did you stop by the Coalition Forces Outreach Center like your Mother asked you to?
Bashir: Yes, Papa I did.
Father: And did you tell them that death squads have been harassing and threatening your Mother, sisters and our neighbors?
Bashir: Yes Papa I did. They said that they already knew and intended to step up patrols. They were very sympathetic and really quite civil.
(Father and son lock eyes, pause, look away, then look back)
Father: A thousand perversions to the Imperialist Occupiers.
Bashir: Praise be to Allah, a thousand perversions.
Labels: Civil War, Creative Writing, Iraq, obey Mother, Published Letters, cognitorex blogspot
September 1st, 2007 at 8:04 am
Silence, El Cid, or I shall have my followers cut out your tongue and feed it to wild hyenas! Naturally the Religion of Peace is committed to non-violent civil discourse and the free exchange of ideas, but if you insist on offending us with your foolish pratings we cannot be held responsible for any “accidents” that may befall you!
Inishallah!