Notes Re Xmas

The time at which present opening commences can be controlled, but the rate of present openage can only be influenced indirectly.

Cats don’t give a damn about presents but are fascinated by crumpled wrapping paper and empty boxes.  

A fourth-grader’s construction-paper mounted Christmas essay on why she loves her parents can be a gift you will cherish, even if she’s overly frank and appears to have a  memory highly selective of Dad’s goofs and at four pages, runs on a bit. 

Any day a bulldog gets to sniff another dog’s pee is bulldog Christmas.

I am not smarter than a fifth grader, except when using all available peeks, copies and save.

200-year-old Chinese furniture is really cool, especially when it’s cheaper than Chinese furniture that was made yesterday. If you live in New England and are interested, reach me via “contact” and I’ll tell you where to get some.  

It’s nearly 4 p.m., and I have not missed the Internet or the news all day. Will check shortly to see if I missed anything.  I’m only on now because I love my fellow man and feel it my duty to communicate.

OK, some Xmas links, a work in progress:    

Blackfive with a special Christmas in Iraq.

Captains Quarters with a prayer for those far away and in harm’s way.

Malkin at Hotair with the reason for the season. Villainous Company, still dressed like a shameless hussy but keeping better company today, takes a similar track. Hey, how come both nativity stories, Matthew’s and Luke’s, are entirely different?*

A lot of presents under the Instatree. Shake this one, it sounds like success in Iraq. I think this might be something that makes noise if you squeeze it.

Iowahawk, “Duuuude, don’t bogart the frankincense.”

Catblogging Xmas at Castle Argghhh!!! And thanking those who don’t stop working when the rest of us do.

Newsbusters lays out an Xmas buffet.

Powerline loads up on Christmas history.

Neoneocon’s got your Xmas bloggerel.

Mudville summons up the Ghost of Christmas Past.

Pajamas has your holiday movie guide and an illegal Noel. As in undocumented Xmas.

American Digest checks what’s hot on Google this aft. Hint: it isn’t the stove.

Jungle Trader, where every post makes a great stocking stuffer.  I think I saw “A 47-year-old man from northwest Russia killed his friend while trying to shoot a pack of cigarettes off his head, local prosecutors said” at the Brookstone kiosk.

Small Dead Animals with Dinesh vs Hitchens, great white northern art and a Canadian Xmas in Kandahar.

The Dissident Frogman with disturbing holiday imagery

Theo, back from sabbatical, leads a rousing God Save the Queen and, being Theo, unwraps a little Xmas totty (NSF family gatherings).

Van der Galien elfs it, with Mom and Dad VDG and the very hot VDG fiance.  Good work, Michael. The elf vid’s nice, too. At VDG’s Poligazette, non-holiday blogging, VDG unwraps the fascinating news that an Iranian nuke strike on Israel is expected to cause up to 800,000 Israeli deaths and up to 28 million Iranian ones. Something less than full Zionist erasure.

Boo hoo hoo … He must have been Riehl bad to get coal!

Norm Geras goes around the world and promises a bangup Boxing Day.

Jeff’s in Thailand, where I spent eight cheery Christmases, but I have no idea what he’s talking about.  Hey Jeff, about that Protein Wisdom, see if you can figure out what the gray mystery meatballs in the noodle soup are.

Ace of Spades HQ notes than the gift that never stopped taking is officially finished: Boston’s Big Dig.  Yeah, sure it is. Also, Achmed the Dead Terrorist’s Jingle Bombs.

Speaking of Massachusetts, I’d like to know where I can exchange in this.  

Tim Blair’s UnMerry Hicksmas.

Tuscan Tony’s secret Xmas confession.

Gift that keeps giving! Tigerhawk spots another surge-happy Dem.

Surber has a $2,500, 58 mpg car under his tree. Looks like a population control project to me.

Gateway has a present for Huckabee from Iran. An endorsement!

* I spent Christmas Eve 1999 in Bethlehem, where the highlight was a kind of running- the-bulls-at-Pamplona scenario with Yasser Arafat’s motorcade in narrow alleys, preceded by several big shovy Palos with AKs.  Anyway, had done some reading in advance on this perplexing matter of inconsistent nativity tales.  There’s a couple of ways of looking at it. One, mystery of the faith. Another, religious scholars are of the opinion that whoever wrote the gospels may have been short on biographical details and used Isaiah as their guide.  That’s where they learned that the messiah needed to be descended from David and born in Bethlehem.  And that, the scholars say, is how you get varying scenarios and begats that provide you with a carpenter from Nazareth who is a) descended from David and b) born in Bethlehem.  Puts the term “gospel” in a different light. Bethlehem is a charming Middle Eastern hilltown.  I recommend the shawerma joint in the northwest corner of the square, which I’m pretty sure has been in continuous operation since the time of Christ.

Oh yeah. You want to know the difference between Matthew’s and Luke’s nativity stories?  You’ll have to go crack the Bible yourself.  What am I supposed to be, your spiritual guide? I hope not.

Topics: Christmas

  Posted by Jules Crittenden at 4:15 pm on Tuesday, December 25, 2007

6 Responses to “Notes Re Xmas”

  1. Americaneocon Says:

    Nice links, Crittenden!

    Here’s to you and yours for the best Christmas ever and for a great ‘08!

  2. Don Surber » Blog Archive » The $2,500 new car Says:

    [...] UPDATE: Jules Crittenden has a Christmas roundup. [...]

  3. PoliGazette » Merry Christmas Says:

    [...] Crittenden has some Holiday observations, while Michelle Malkin explains what Christmas is all about, as does HCDL at Wake Up America. Of [...]

  4. The_Real_JeffS Says:

    Merry Christmas to you and your family, Jules!

    That includes the cat. The bulldog as well, providing he didn’t pee in the house.

  5. tanstaafl Says:

    I’m only on now because I love my fellow man and feel it my duty to communicate.

    And (tho’ I sense a wee tad irony tinging that statement) you’ve been a stand out communicator.

  6. Sissy Willis Says:

    Cats and empty boxes? Just ask Tiny:

    The shoe fits

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