Laura Bush Derangement Syndrome

Looks like a lot like bulimia as sexist SF Chron lefty Mark Morford brings up a lukewarm puddle of half-digested feminist junkfood cliches in this slam on Laura Bush: “Docile doormat … prim, sexless, nearly useless.”  

Irony abounds as he sings praises of Teresa Heinz who, as not a few people noted at the time, probably would have made a better candidate than her docile doormat of a sexless, nearly useless husband. A Republican candidate, no less … Morford left out the parts about her being a Republican named Heinz until husband No. 2 started running, at which point she became a Democrat named Kerry.  Subsequently reported to be calling herself Heinz again, but Motford sticks with the double-marital “Teresa Heinz Kerry.”

More irony as he mocks former librarian/stay-at-home mom Laura Bush for being a former librarian/sta-at-home mom and belittles the focus on literacy. It’s not that surprising when you consider the left’s antipathy to some of the most effective boosts to functional literacy in this country; mandatory scholastic achievement testing and competition to the public schools. In an age when children spend hours staring at screens, she thinks it might be helpful for them to read books, and would like adults to read to them. Not clear why someone who writes for a newspaper would object to that. By the way, I was going to excerpt some of this column to spare anyone having to click the link, but it is such a poorly written ramble that, like a pool of vomit, it lacks sufficient form to make excerpting practical, the chunky bits being chewed up and splattered haphazardly.  

It’s all a little awkward when one of the leading candidates on his side of the aisle is claiming her husband’s experience as her own, and the other’s wife, described here as “outspoken and sarcastic and smart as hell” has a hard time keeping her foot out of her mouth and acknowledges that without affirmative action she wouldn’t have cut it.

The biggest irony may be Morford’s expressed desire to retire the “dangerous feminine cliche,” the “docile doormat first lady,” at the end of a column in which he’s tapped every anti-conservative cliche he could think of. 

But the big question is, why did he even write this? He never mentions the lovely Mrs. McCain, and there’s no Bush on the ticket this time. Looks like he was stuck for something to write, saw the news of Laura Bush on a book tour with her daughters,  stuck his finger down his throat and up it came. Or maybe he genuinely finds it sickening that some women choose to raise their children, chart their own path in their own chosen fields, and don’t feel the need to mouth off gratuitously, ride coattails, etc. 

Toldjah examines Morford’s half-baked misogyno-feminism. 

The Sagacious Blonde, no docile doormat herself, says Morford doesn’t know Laura Bush.

Malkin includes all kinds of helpful SF Chron contact information if you also found this column revolting.

Topics: Bush, feminism, fishwrap, women

  Posted by Jules Crittenden at 10:50 pm on Wednesday, April 30, 2008

9 Responses to “Laura Bush Derangement Syndrome”

  1. Sister Toldjah Says:

    Dumba** of the month award

    In what has to be one of the most vicious, uncalled for columns I’ve ever read, the SF Chronicle’s Mark Morford goes off on First Lady Laura Bush, accusing her of being “the ideal Republican wife: Prim, sexless, nearly useless, lets t…

  2. Robert Says:

    Teresa Heinz — IIRC, after she gave out her recipe for raisins soaked in gin, she was not heard from again.

    What are they ever going to do after next January? Columns don’t write themselves.

  3. JM Hanes Says:

    “Columns don’t write themselves”

    I’m not so sure. This one sounds like he just turned in the transcript of a session with his shrink.

  4. The Thunder Run Says:

    Web Reconnaissance for 05/01/2008

    A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention, updated throughout the day…so check back often.

  5. RebeccaH Says:

    You know what they say about a million monkeys on a million typewriters. Now we see it doesn’t turn out so well.

  6. Thursday Linkaroos : Stop The ACLU Says:

    [...] the Taliban Atlas Shrugs: Carter Blames Israel for Hamas Disrupting Fuel to Gaza Jules Crittenden: Laura Bush Derangement Syndrome Doug Ross: There will be no questions allowed during the Planetary Emergency Don Surber: Daily [...]

  7. Banjo Says:

    Morford is gay? ‘Nuff said?

  8. Banjo Says:

    Forget the question mark. Morford IS gay.

  9. Missred Says:

    Laura Bush is dignified. A word the left knows nothing about. They like their women crass and mouthy

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