XXX Bailout
The porn industry wants a stimulus package to get over the hump. Tastelessness alert: Even worse jokes rounded up after the news, via CNN.
“The take here is that everyone and their mother want to be bailed out from the banks to the big three,” said Owen Moogan, spokesman for Larry Flynt. “The porn industry has been hurt by the downturn like everyone else and they are going to ask for the $5 billion. Is it the most serious thing in the world? Is it going to make the lives of Americans better if it happens? It is not for them to determine.”
…
Flynt and (Girls Gone Wild CEO Joe) Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow.
But the industry leaders said the issue is a nation in need. “People are too depressed to be sexually active,” Flynt said in the statement. “This is very unhealthy as a nation. Americans can do without cars and such but they cannot do without sex.”
“With all this economic misery and people losing all that money, sex is the farthest thing from their mind. It’s time for congress to rejuvenate the sexual appetite of America. The only way they can do this is by supporting the adult industry and doing it quickly.”
Why not? All the other strumpets are getting one. Write your congressman to support this important initiative to make a mockery of Congress, the whores that control it, and their wanton, self-gratifying policies, not to mention the rampant exhibitionism. This proposal must be debated on the floor. That place is full of master debaters, after all. A lot of them may need to recuse themselves, though. Conflict of interest.
They don’t really need a bailout anyway. They’ve just decided to show up at Paulson’s garden party with big fat cigars, loud suits and busty strippers on each arm.
You know, maybe we should be grateful at least one of our industries in this country is adult.
Hot Air: “Just another way for taxpayers to get screwed.”
Liberal Values has an earnest discussion of ”Bush,” “crack” and things that are “hard.”
Think Progress, also working it.
TMZ re Flynt’s “bone.”
Steyn: The Big Threesome.
Malkin’s hat trick: “Cheeky,” ”Nancy Pelosi: Stop Talking About The Cost of Stimulus” and “Obama’s stimulus Trojan horse.”
Theo goes straight to Congporn.
Trust the Democratic Daily to bleed the life out of the funniest thing to happen in American politics since the new Bush-Clinton admin got elected. Exhaustive humoristic japery with helpful explanantions at the link.
Balloon Juice doesn’t even try to get it up. Must be kind, he has no balls.
Meanwhile, you’d think a pirate would get it. Then again, you’d think a pirate would be in favor of relieving the government of much booty …
Hey, wait a minute, I think I need to rename this post … Booty Call. Segue with booty-licious funk porn-about-to-happen soundtrack.
Related, not so different, via Gateway: Bill Clinton does an encore in the Oral … I mean Oval Office. UK Telegraph: “”I just love that rug,’ he cooed, looking down … ”
Welcome NRO’s The Corner, Theo Sparkists, etal. Hey, want to see something obscene? It’s Gaza, Trash Heap of Moral Authority.
Posted by Jules Crittenden at 10:30 pm on Wednesday, January 7, 2009
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January 8th, 2009 at 1:37 am
[...] World’s oldest profession not recession-proof” (see previous comment); Jules Crittenden (Right) agrees with me, i.e. “Why Not?”; McQ (Right) of QandO also agrees, i.e., [...]
January 8th, 2009 at 9:20 am
Imageshack gave it to me for the use of “porn” in the title and post. Banned my use of one of the 2008 Weblog Awards badges :)