Most Boring Oscars Ever
That would have to be pretty bad. The last 30-odd bored me to tears … when I bothered to watch them, which wasn’t often … except maybe the one where that annoying weepy Italian comic ran over the tops of all the chairs, which was momentarily startling.
Even Titanic star Winslet doesn’t want to be associated with this trainwreck, claiming an entirely believeable case of the vapors. Desperate Academy is trying to sort out a last-minute solution to the glitz deficit. Maybe they should consider some wardrobe malfunctions. A lot of them. I’d watch that. “And the Oscar goes to … whoops!” That and a hook or a gong with some goons to unceremoniously drag the gushers off stage. That might attract a younger audience, though to lock those viewers in they’ll need fart jokes and vomit.
Disaster report from Deadline Hollywood. Boston Herald’s Perigard with hopes for a mutant superhero save. Hey, maybe they should try making more movies that don’t suck, while lecturing. But you know how I feel about Hollywood’s tragic irrelevance. Big Hollywood with some Oscar predictions here. Big Hollywood with what’s hot on Oscar weekend … “Madea Goes To Jail,” and the news that if you wanted to see the nominees, you might have to hunt them down.
Surber goes deep: Will anyone dress worse than Babs, 1969?
Hot Air with Oscar horrors: Winners list leaked! Your opportunity to skip the dumb political speeches or a hoax?
Related, not so different. Ideas on viewership boosting from Protein Wisdom. No, not the beheading part, though I bet waterboarding a few jihadis on stage might draw eyeballs. Everybody loves controversy! It’s the part about boosting blog hits. Skip the wardrobe, go straight to the malfunction.
It’s a riff off the Other McCain’s Rule No. 5 Sunday.
Driscoll, meanwhile, with what sounds like a list of really great movie titles, starting with “A Clockwork Obama.”
Hey, how about a “Network” remake? Gateway with your “Mad as Hell” 2009 redux vid.
Enough about the movies. Ace with your TV news; recessionary sitcoms and a review of HBO’s Taking Chance. Powerline with another look at Chance. I guess I’m going to have to watch it, though to be frank, after that piece of crap “Generation Kill” potty-talk wallow of a disparagement of the Iraq war, I’m not sure I need HBO showing me how concerned they are about the dead. It is being heralded for not taking sides, for leaving the politics out of it, though the clamor to shoot the coffins coming off the ramps at Dover AFB was all about politics and nothing about honoring the dead. Sounds a little like supporting the troops, just not what they are dying for. Which brings us full circle back to Hollywood and sucking. How about taking a side that doesn’t? Or, non-politically, honoring what they are doing in life?
Topics: Hollywood
Posted by Jules Crittenden at 9:12 am Comments (2) on Sunday, February 22, 2009
2 Responses to “Most Boring Oscars Ever”
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February 22nd, 2009 at 9:23 am
Jules,
I dunno. I haven’t had any interest in the oscars, or what Hollywood gossips are saying, for a couple decades now. No one I know watches them.
Besides, what does it say about a nation in financial crisis that these folks, the same Hollywood folks who want a piece of the bailout, are planning this glitz-fest, and “I Love me” orgy complete with exclusive after-parties? Clueless? You betcha!
Now, some folks might remark that they did the same stuff back in the Great depression, and they’d be correct. But back then, Hollywood stars and moguls showed themselves (even if only in public) to be Americans first, who wanted to help the country and other folks out. They didn’t get involved as much in partizan politics, etc.
Today, it’s a whole new ballgame, and I hope these oscars get the lowest ratings ever. Maybe they’ll go away. Maybe. :)
February 22nd, 2009 at 6:46 pm
The oscars,one more plot in the vast wasteland of TV. A celebration on the small screen of what didn’t get watched on the big screen.
The net is far more interesting. If nothing else, you can plan your next purchasing attack on the real world.
Real world = 1,
Make believe = 0.