Your Pirate Name

Pirates ARRRRRRRe all the rage. You’re gonna need a pirate name if you want to be cool. Can’t come up with one yourself? That’s why they invented the Internet. Pirate name generator.

I’m Jelly-Legs Lazlo. Sounds about right.

The president of the United States? Eel-Skin Eugene. Kind of slippery.

The last president of the United States? Cap’n Billy Ropeburn. Hey, this thing really works! The last vice president of the United States? Butt-Ugly Elmer Hacke. This thing is spot on.

Never trust a pirate named “Eugene.”

Here’s more:

Joe Biden … Cap’n Seamus Knifenose. Yeah, his own.

Hillary Clinton … Cap’n Angelina Swiftknife. Scary.

John Kerry … Huge Baird Bonny. We call him Long Jawn around here, but that works.

With a nod to saveliberty at twitter.

Topics: everything

  Posted by Jules Crittenden at 9:40 am on Tuesday, April 14, 2009

7 Responses to “Your Pirate Name”

  1. AW1 Tim Says:

    John Frikkin’ KerrY? I thought Liveshot’s other moniker was Lurch… :)

  2. AW1 Tim Says:

    Heh,

    My Pirate name is: “Burnin’ Diego Barbossa”

    Aye, hand me another torch, lads….. we’ll get these fire’s stoked and ragin or my name isn’t Burnin’ Diego Barbossa!

  3. Jules Crittenden Says:

    Lurch is his sitcom name. Long Jawn is his pirate name.

  4. AW1 Tim Says:

    Gotcha… Thanks!

  5. RebeccaH Says:

    Oh dear. I came up with the alarming “Pirate Angie the Infected”.

    It’s just allergies, honest.

  6. AW1 Tim Says:

    Arrgghh! More Rum, there, Angie! Add a splash of lime juice to ward off the scurvy!

  7. saveliberty Says:

    Thank you, Jules!

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