Danger Zone!
It’s the horrible nexus of holidays and winter, arriving right around the time that you might be losing a little steam from your summer/spring startup. Finding it a little harder to get out and work out. The kids just brought home bags of Halloween candy and there will be more piled up at work. What are you going to do, not eat it?
Part 6 of Crittenden’s “So You Want to Live Forever” series:
It’s getting colder and Thanksgiving is around the corner, which basically encourages people to burrow in and eat, and there are is the endless holiday baking, which people feel compelled to share. They figure they’ll get rid of the temptation and run up feel-good neigborliness points by making it your problem.
The good news is, if you’re still running, walking and biking 2 to 5 miles a day, plus doing situps and crunches, you can pretty much eat all the candy and baked stuff you want. Consider that a motivator. If you’re working out like that, chances are your discipline is at a pretty high level, and you’ve found that your desire to eat a lot of that crap has gone down, and your enjoyment level has gone up, because you know you’re burning it.
If you’re slipping on exercise, now is the time get back in with a short walk/run/ride. It comes back quicker than you think. Do it now, before winter really sets in. Because chances are you won’t be starting up again then.
Some people move it inside, to gyms and Stairmasters at this time of year. That’s fine. Did you kow that January is the single biggest month for gym memberships, after your American packs on up to 10 extra pounds? Dentists and debt counselors are doing a bangup business at this time of year, too. (Vigorous exercise is really good for your mental health, BTW. It’ll even make you feel good about that mountain of debt you’re dealing with.)
As a cheap bastard, I generally prefered using gravity and the great outdoors as my gym, though in New England, that is sometimes miserable. If you live down south, it’s probably just getting nice outside, but up here, it’s about to become a challenge not just to get off the couch, but to get out the door.
Here’s the good news. By employing layers … cut the sleeves off an old sweatshirt, get some UnderArmor or the equivalent, gets some gloves and a watch cap … you can pretty much run all year if it isn’t actively sleeting or blowing a blizzard. Do your pushups and situps inside, and you’ll be warmed up by the time you go out. It isn’t that bad. Anyway, did I ever say there wasn’t going to be misery? To quote a dour Army Ranger who was unhappy about being assigned to train up a bunch of sad sack, professional half-ass journos for war:
“If I was running this show, there’d be a whole lot more misery.”
Then comes the really great part of winter. No, it’s not snow camping. That truly is miserable. Especially if you’re determined to hike in. I did it once in the White Mountains. It really sucked. I don’t know what I was thinking. I strongly advise not doing unless you’re really demented and/or know what you are doing.
It’s cross-country skiiing.
Some people like snow-shoeing. Never done that. Some people like downhill … it is a bit of a workout, and you ought to be in shape if you’re going to do it.
I like cross-country. Less crowded, less noisy, less filthy and a lot cheaper … four people can rent and ski for less than it costs one person to do the same at a downhill place. If you own your own gear, you can do it for free. It’s also a lot warmer. Anything you go ski to come down, you have to climb up first. It is one of the greatest full body workouts ever invented. I got back to it and introduced my kids to it over the last couple of years. All the people we passed had smiles on their faces like they were high. Which some of the older hippy-looking ones might have been. And there were a lot of old people out there, along with families and the Spandex-wearing hyperathletic skaters. Very short learning curve for beginners. This is healthy, lifelong exercise that will make you want to get outside in the dead of winter, burn calories like no one’s business, and really earn your meal and your beer at the end of the day.
Not quite up to all that yet? Don’t feel bad. A lot of people aren’t. That’s why they invented malls. Here’s a handy guide to holiday fitness, aimed at novices and those for whom sub-freezing workouts might be a health hazard.
In other “Live Forever” business, embed freelancer J.D. Johannes’ Fit for Combat: When Fitness is a Matter of Life or Death is now the site’s top bestseller in nearly a year of Amazon operations. Still waiting for reader reviews and progress reports from all 15 of you who bought it.
Previously:
Old? Fat? Feeling Death’s Icy Chill Down Your Neck? How To Live Forever Part 1, the Crittenden Workout for Middle-Aged Fat Bastards.
How To Live Forever Part 2 The Beer Workout. Drink and be healthy.
How to Live Forever Part 3 Israeli research finding: Advanced geezerdom no bar to exercise’s life-extending benefits.
How To Live Forever Part 4: Fit For Combat You think preparing for combat is healthy? Try combat. Hey, when’s someone going to market the Combat Weight Loss Program?
Run For Your Lives! Just got in that dirty little two-miler …
Topics: Live Forever Or Die Trying!
Posted by Jules Crittenden at 12:09 pm on Monday, November 2, 2009
2 Responses to “Danger Zone!”
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November 2nd, 2009 at 6:54 pm
LOL No one’s commenting? Jules, you intimidated your audience.
I won’t say how much exercise I do because in my current state, this does not help your argument.
November 3rd, 2009 at 10:15 am
Well, I’m not intimidated! Mr. C., you’re a blogger after my own heart. Will you be doing a post on injuries? Us 40+ types can get bogged down with tendonitis and whatnot. I’d be very interested in your take on when to push thru discomfort, when to sit back with an icepack, cross-training to avoid use injuries, etc.
And maybe some alternative strategies to stay in shape while that strained tendon heals up.
And I bet lots of people would be interested in how to get gym benefits at home with the expense of a gym membership. Times are tough.
Love the fitness posts!