Moore To Obama, Come In Please Obama
Sight unseen, I’m gonna go out on a limb and call Michael Moore’s Open Letter to President Obama a must-read. OK, give me a minute to scan the thing. Here goes. I’m going to live-mock it, line by line, graph by graph:
Do you really want to be the new “war president”? If you go to West Point tomorrow night (Tuesday, 8pm) and announce that you are increasing, rather than withdrawing, the troops in Afghanistan, you are the new war president. Pure and simple.
Well, we could dicker about what makes a “wartime president.” Moore sees this in stark black-and-white terms, in or out. I kind of think you need to be actually interested in fighting the war rather than scoring political points. There are gray areas, like being a “protracted debacle at the end of which we quit president” or a “political calculation with pointless sacrifice president” as opposed to an out-and-out “surrender president.”
And with that you will do the worst possible thing you could do — destroy the hopes and dreams so many millions have placed in you. With just one speech tomorrow night you will turn a multitude of young people who were the backbone of your campaign into disillusioned cynics.
Too late.
You will teach them what they’ve always heard is true — that all politicians are alike. I simply can’t believe you’re about to do what they say you are going to do. Please say it isn’t so.
If those young people haven’t figured that out yet, now’s a good time. Anyway, Michael Moore thinks rendering so much American sacrifice meaningless and condemning enitre regions to backward, terrorism-fostering anarchy for the purposes of maintaining blinkered innocence is going to work … he might be right. Look at the prevailing views about Vietnam, after all.
It is not your job to do what the generals tell you to do. We are a civilian-run government. WE tell the Joint Chiefs what to do, not the other way around.
Yeah. Just like NASA. It’s not their job to tell us how to get to the moon. (Correct me if I’m wrong, but McChrystal and the Joint Chiefs offered up a series of options. At the request of the president. Fortunately, both of those parties have a better grasp of how our government works than Michael Moore. He must be confusing us with Cuba. Or Venezuela.)
That’s the way General Washington insisted it must be.
What! You mean a general told us what to do?
That’s what President Truman told General MacArthur when MacArthur wanted to invade China. “You’re fired!,” said Truman, and that was that.
Yeah, he’s got a point. We’re still in that war. Look, a better example is when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor … (BTW, Mike, you don’t need that comma between the exclamation mark and the quotation marks.)
And you should have fired Gen. McChrystal when he went to the press to preempt you, telling the press what YOU had to do. Let me be blunt: We love our kids in the armed services, but we f*#&in’ hate these generals, from Westmoreland in Vietnam to, yes, even Colin Powell for lying to the UN with his made-up drawings of WMD (he has since sought redemption).
So now you feel backed into a corner. 30 years ago this past Thursday (Thanksgiving) the Soviet generals had a cool idea — “Let’s invade Afghanistan!” Well, that turned out to be the final nail in the USSR coffin.
Nice side benefit to an otherwise disastrous and unnecessary debacle that haunts us to this day. (See “9/11″). Fortunately, we’re not commies. And our Afghan experience resembles theirs in exactly, let’s see, no way whatsoever. Yet.
There’s a reason they don’t call Afghanistan the “Garden State” (though they probably should, seeing how the corrupt President Karzai, whom we back, has his brother in the heroin trade raising poppies). Afghanistan’s nickname is the “Graveyard of Empires.” If you don’t believe it, give the British a call. I’d have you call Genghis Khan but I lost his number. I do have Gorbachev’s number though. It’s + 41 22 789 1662. I’m sure he could give you an earful about the historic blunder you’re about to commit.
Ha ha, Afghan-New Jersey comparisons. That’s a pretty good one. OK, more warmed-over Afghan “Graveyard of Empires” whining. Maybe it’s about time for someone to point out that the British Empire wasn’t exactly croaked by Afghanistan, and even the Soviet Union had other croak help. Aside from that New Jersey joke, this guy really doesn’t have any new material.
With our economic collapse still in full swing and our precious young men and women being sacrificed on the altar of arrogance and greed, the breakdown of this great civilization we call America will head, full throttle, into oblivion if you become the “war president.” Empires never think the end is near, until the end is here. Empires think that more evil will force the heathens to toe the line — and yet it never works. The heathens usually tear them to shreds.
Full throttle oblivion … damn. That sounds like fun. Especially if there’s evil involved. I’m in.
Choose carefully, President Obama. You of all people know that it doesn’t have to be this way. You still have a few hours to listen to your heart, and your own clear thinking. You know that nothing good can come from sending more troops halfway around the world to a place neither you nor they understand, to achieve an objective that neither you nor they understand, in a country that does not want us there. You can feel it in your bones.
You know, if the president of the United States is not supposed to be taking orders from generals, I’m pretty sure he isn’t supposed to be taking orders from fat, rich, commie filmmakers, either.
I know you know that there are LESS than a hundred al-Qaeda left in Afghanistan! A hundred thousand troops trying to crush a hundred guys living in caves? Are you serious? Have you drunk Bush’s Kool-Aid? I refuse to believe it.
Your potential decision to expand the war (while saying that you’re doing it so you can “end the war”) will do more to set your legacy in stone than any of the great things you’ve said and done in your first year. One more throwing a bone from you to the Republicans and the coalition of the hopeful and the hopeless may be gone — and this nation will be back in the hands of the haters quicker than you can shout “tea bag!”
OK, I gotta say I think I agree with Michael Moore here. Except maybe on the “great things” “haters” and “teabag!” parts. But doing anything halfway, for purposes of baby-splitting political wishful thinking … not a good idea. (I’m ignoring that “LESS than a hundred al-Qaeda” bit. Moore’s level of strategic grasp pretty much speaks for itself. As for whether he drank “Bush’s Kool-Aid,” I think he got waterboarded with it. Harsh reality that he’s been coughing up and trying to get the civil rights lawyers to slap out of his lungs ever since.)
We the people still love you. We the people still have a sliver of hope. But we the people can’t take it anymore. We can’t take your caving in, over and over, when we elected you by a big, wide margin of millions to get in there and get the job done. What part of “landslide victory” don’t you understand?
Yeah, pretty pathetic, isn’t it? Remember the big 2006 mandate? Your guys couldn’t hang with that, either. Bush led them around by the nose, won his war anyway.
Don’t be deceived into thinking that sending a few more troops into Afghanistan will make a difference, or earn you the respect of the haters.
Hear, hear! Send the full request! Just like General Washington would have.
They will not stop until this country is torn asunder and every last dollar is extracted from the poor and soon-to-be poor.
Now that’s just silly. The poor don’t have any money. Besides, the “haters” are the ones who have been trying to get Obama not to extract every dollar from the poor and soon-to-be-poor.
You could send a million troops over there and the crazy Right still wouldn’t be happy.
Right. Because that wold be dumb.
You would still be the victim of their incessant venom on hate radio and television because no matter what you do, you can’t change the one thing about yourself that sends them over the edge.
You mean the inexperienced, inept, hypocritical part?
The haters were not the ones who elected you, and they can’t be won over by abandoning the rest of us.
I’m pretty sure the “haters” aren’t the target here, but whatever.
President Obama, it’s time to come home. Ask your neighbors in Chicago and the parents of the young men and women doing the fighting and dying if they want more billions and more troops sent to Afghanistan.
You’ll notice Obama’s “neighbors in Chicago” and “the parents of the young men and women doing the fighting and dying” are presented as separate and distinct groups.
Do you think they will say, “No, we don’t need health care, we don’t need jobs, we don’t need homes. You go on ahead, Mr. President, and send our wealth and our sons and daughters overseas, ’cause we don’t need them, either.”
Probably not. Artificial negative constructs like that rarely represent any kind of reality or even a reserve reality, or the hot-dog addict wouldn’t have to resort to them to make up his point.
What would Martin Luther King, Jr. do? What would your grandmother do? Not send more poor people to kill other poor people who pose no threat to them, that’s what they’d do. Not spend billions and trillions to wage war while American children are sleeping on the streets and standing in bread lines.
Well, in answer to WWMLKJrD and WWgrandmaD, who cares? This isn’t a lunchcounter sit-in, and neither of those people were president of the United States. In wartime. BTW, I’d like to see one of these breadlines and the children sleeping in the streets. I think he’s mixing the United States up with some kind of Soviet Union/Mumbai hodgepodge. Here, desperately poor and homeless families sleep in motel rooms, get food stamps and go to food pantries.
All of us that voted and prayed for you and cried the night of your victory have endured an Orwellian hell of eight years of crimes committed in our name: torture, rendition, suspension of the bill of rights, invading nations who had not attacked us, blowing up neighborhoods that Saddam “might” be in (but never was), slaughtering wedding parties in Afghanistan. We watched as hundreds of thousands of Iraqi civilians were slaughtered and tens of thousands of our brave young men and women were killed, maimed, or endured mental anguish — the full terror of which we scarcely know.
“Scarcely know” being the operative words. You’ll remember Moore’s famous depiction of the happy kite-flying nation that was Iraq. But more to the point, I like the ipart about how he “endured an Orwellian hell.”
When we elected you we didn’t expect miracles. We didn’t even expect much change.
Sorry, I have to stop you there. As I recall, you pretty much did expect miracles. Miraculous change. Come on, no grab backs. OK, he’s heading out on a tub-thumping note:
But we expected some. We thought you would stop the madness. Stop the killing. Stop the insane idea that men with guns can reorganize a nation that doesn’t even function as a nation and never, ever has.
Stop, stop, stop! For the sake of the lives of young Americans and Afghan civilians, stop. For the sake of your presidency, hope, and the future of our nation, stop. For God’s sake, stop.
Tonight we still have hope.
Tomorrow, we shall see. The ball is in your court. You DON’T have to do this. You can be a profile in courage. You can be your mother’s son.
We’re counting on you.
Yes, stop the madness! Stop, stop, stop! “The ball is in your court.” “You can be a profile in courage.” Stop, stop, please! Can’t a hectoring multi-million-dollar Academy Award-winning documentarian at least afford to hire someone to look up some slightly less hackneyed cliches for him?
UPDATE: Terrye in comments gets points for noting that Obama actually ran on fighting the Afghan war and theoretically shouldn’t be disappointing or surprising anyone when he pretends to support it now. Excellent observation, Terrye. It may be that Moore assumed Obama was lying — much like gay activists assumed he was lying about gay marriage and Don’t Ask Don’t Tell – and Moore is disappointed now to learn he was only half lying. For a comparable double-reverse situation, consider how that dolt Glenn Greenwald, the anti-GWOT crusader who thought Obama was serious about ending the frightful abuse of jihadi constitutional rights, has been increasingly outraged to learn he was only half-serious about that.
Topics: Obama
Posted by Jules Crittenden at 1:16 pm Comments (11) on Monday, November 30, 2009
11 Responses to “Moore To Obama, Come In Please Obama”
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November 30th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
What part of “landslide victory” don’t you understand?
And, apparently, Obama is finally figuring out that “landslide victory” doesn’t mean what Michael Moore thinks it means.
November 30th, 2009 at 2:29 pm
The big O has a Truth in Advertising problem. This is his version of moving to the middle, the middle he marketed himself as.
Wonder how much of his dither delay was worrying about offending the libs? So now they are shocked, poor babies. We have already been there, those of us who ever believed he might be centrist.
He won’t have the credibility Bill Clinton did in moving to the middle, both are liars, but Clinton is more talented at it. The percentage of credulous Americans is not high enough to buoy up the big O.
November 30th, 2009 at 3:25 pm
OK, Mike, one question: “Who is the rube?”.
November 30th, 2009 at 5:03 pm
It seems to me that Obama ran on winning the good war. I do not remember him promising to surrender in Afghanistan. I think Moore has his wars mixed up.
November 30th, 2009 at 5:37 pm
[...] that’s the problem with the Left these days [A nice take down by Jules Crittendon here]. They lack intellectual coherence and yes, [...]
November 30th, 2009 at 5:39 pm
What would Grandma do? LOL
November 30th, 2009 at 7:43 pm
That was a fun read. You had me at the “General Washington told us what to do.”
December 1st, 2009 at 12:12 am
That must have been fun! Except that it’s just too easy to debunk Moore. Counts as recreation but doesn’t go on your permanent records.
Along with Moore’s disillusion, news has been coming in of similar states of mind amongst our European and Arab/Muslim friends.
Is it time for another go around of the legend of the squandered sympathy? I don’t think so: that was about how bushitler cowboy diplomacy had squandered the outpouring of good will extended to the US in the aftermath of 9/11. Smartough diplomacy and engagement simply squandered the respect of allies and enemies alike. No real story there, I don’t think.
December 1st, 2009 at 3:35 am
I see Mickey hasn’t yet wearied of playing at being Lord Haw Haw.
December 1st, 2009 at 10:23 am
Jules writes:
“Yes, stop the madness! Stop, stop, stop! “The ball is in your court.” “You can be a profile in courage.” Stop, stop, please! Can’t a hectoring multi-million-dollar Academy Award-winning documentarian at least afford to hire someone to look up some slightly less hackneyed cliches for him?”
Anonymous Herald intern immediately composes headline:
“Accident has Tiger by the tail”
You should talk. You need to go flog whoever is responsible, set an example for those who follow. Leave the carcass twisting in the wind.
I understand it’s difficult for you as a trained professional, but do you think it’s easy for us to read this stuff? It’s not.
December 1st, 2009 at 10:50 am
[...] great analysis from Jules Crittenden. And what would happen if Obama listened to Moore … we would be turning Afghanistan over to the [...]